Like everyone else right now, I have a lot of feels that I don’t like having.
I feel dull on the inside. Not unexciting dull, but empty dull. Like can anything else not go right?
I am tired, easily distracted, it’s been hard to remain motivated.
Grief is here…it has set in. I feel myself wading in it.
There is a part of life that has died. Grief takes on tangibles and intangibles. Personally, right now, today, I am in a pool of both.
I am sad life isn’t the way it once was (and I liked it!)
I am sad there is so much negativity.
I am sad there is so much division.
I am devastated that there are people, families, children that are so afraid for their life they are clinging to airplanes as they take off.
Where is the logic in that?
I am sad I am getting ready to have a baby in the midst of all this worldly chaos and I can’t promise protection, peace of mind, safety…steadiness to this new life, or any of my kids.
I am a person of action.
This is my top 5 of how I cope with this uninvited-not-going-anywhere-set-in-dull-grief.
Smile.
“It takes more muscles to frown than to smile!” While that isn’t a proven fact, it feels good to smile. According to SCL Health, when we smile we release endorphins which act as a mild pain reliever, and the serotonin released is an antidepressant. Sometimes its an active choice to smile, but one I don’t regret. And I’ve found it is contagious.
Deep Breaths.
I feel like this is a cliche, but when I take a few minutes to focus on my breathing, I ‘pep-talk’ myself. When I breathe in, I mentally tell myself what I want to breathe in: increased faith, love, more open awareness; whatever it is, and I name what I am breathing out; bad attitude, negative thoughts, fear, etc.
Prayer.
I have shared that my faith is the cornerstone of my life. I have a few little one-liners I say over and over when I am battling the dull grief inside. Some of my favorites are, “If you are who you are meant to be you will set the world on fire”, “You increase while I decrease”, “My faith is greater than any fear.” They are easy, well known, so come to mind quickly.
Move.
2 minutes of movement can give your brain enough time to quickly reset. This doesn’t erase my feelings, but provides a change of scenery or space.
Share.
Do you have 1 person you can be real with? This is the most important for me. I have to extrovert. Luckily, I am very blessed to have a couple friends and a husband who provide a safe outlet for me to be honest with how I am feeling and why. If you are looking for someone to be this space for you, you know where to find me 🙂
What are some ways you have been able to successfully live your grief?