Today we celebrate your 9th birthday.
I can’t even believe it. As each year passes, my heart swells with more and more gratitude for the gift of you.
Love can’t help but create more love, and I see that every day because of you.
I don’t always feel like I am worthy to be your mom and it is so humbling to know that, yes, in fact I am…that I was chosen for that role.
I remind you every year that you gave me the greatest gifts–making me a mom, and in your life and death, awakening me.
This year, I have seen how not only have you shaped me into the best me, but how you are so a part of our life as you share pieces of your heart within our family.
Iris has come into her own this year. I have watched her go from being so timid and shy to flourishing with a confidence that comes from not just knowing, but owning who she is. The persistence she has in all things is not of this world…and I know that she finds strength from you, her big sister.
Fulton has been on a medical roller coaster. Sitting with him in the hospital bed oftentimes took me right back to the precious moments laying next to you. On Good Friday when he was admitted, his response was how he was thankful to be able to suffer like Jesus…an epiphany I know you placed on his heart.
Auggie doesn’t have a malicious bone in his body and is the first one to comfort another. When empathy just pours out of him I see you.
Zelie….well, she could single-handedly take over a small country at age 4. Her sass is unprecedented and without a doubt, she shares this with you. Her determination for life is a character trait I know you fuel in her.
Pax brings my heart so much peace and joy…we call him Curious George, and although he causes a lot of chaos, the steady undercurrent is always just peace. Even in all the tumult, we experienced with you, you gave us peace knowing God was always present.
And Miliana.
She’s not even 1 yet, but it is terrifying because I know she is just like Zelie.
But I can’t ever look at her and not see you. Her eyes are absolutely captivating and they see right through you. They sparkle even when she cries. Your eyes were a window to Heaven, and I am so grateful I can see them again.
The kids decided the best way to celebrate you today was writing notes and sending them to you in Heaven via balloons. I love this idea, even though I know that all the words I want to share with you about how much I love you, how grateful I am for you, how proud I am of you could never fit into a balloon…so I am glad all the thoughts of my heart go straight to you.
Vivi, I could have never asked for a better firstborn. I wouldn’t change a moment I had with you. You are cherished, remembered, loved and so present.
Thanking God for the gift of you.
Love you Baby Girl,
Mom